...Humor Section...
---Ouch Chrono------------
 There is not that much softair action here so if on a day to day basis we want to skirmish, a maximum of four of us go to the woods and play our famous "carnage skirmish". Carnage skirmish consists of playing with goggles, a gas gun or AEG and [usually] short sleeved T-shirts. Basically the difference is that you [are] not dead when you say "hit", [but] you are dead when you are in so much pain that your opponent decides not to shoot you any more (which normally occurs when he has emptied his clip). Being like this you can probably imagine that gun fights take place at 3 or 4 meters the at most so it hurts...although after 15 shots or so you donīt feel the pain anymore.

Shot Name
Horn shot


Enrique
Iglesias

Big Genital
Shot

Leper

I Quit Shot

Crybaby
carnage shot
 Fps
400


350


-?-


365

340

400

 Distance
5 Meters


2 Meters


Unknown


4 Meters

.5 Meter

0 Meters

 Effect
A shot on the forehead. The affected area is swollen to a size that it looks like a horn is growing on your head.
A shot 2cm below the glasses and 1cm to the side of the nose. The coagulated blood of the affected area looks like Iglesiasīs wart.
No comments. Extremely painful. Ask my friend...or ex-friend.
You get shot everywere. There are so many affected areas that it looks like the skin is falling of.
It is a shot in the chest. The affected person is a crybaby and wants to go to mama.
Everybody empties their clip on the crybaby (happens after the I quit shot). The affected corpse goes to mama in a bag.

For your quick reference, here is how you can tell what you're dealing with:
Cry
ARGGG
ARGGGGGHHHH

WOOOARGHHHH
!X@$%![Edited]
WAAARGGGGHHHH!!!

2 SECOND SILENCE followed by AAAAAAAARRGGGH!
 Fps
280
351

372
425
450

800
 What it means
Standard Shot.
Victim thinks - "Iīm not doing this Rambo stuff any more!"
Victim thinks - "Yesss I want more!"
Pain provokes severe swearing.
Victim decides to spend all his money on a bigger gun for vengeance.
Some body has managed to slip a lead pellet gun into the game.

By Berserk Snoopy, Spain

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